Happy Thanksgiving – to all of us

November 27, 2008 · Filed Under LAW, Military Parents, National Guard Parents · 1 Comment 

Happy Thanksgiving to the Moms and Dads, Sisters and Brothers, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Gramma and Grandpas – of the men and women serving in uniform today.   If they are across the table from you, smile at them, love them and tell them we are proud to be in their extended family.  If they are eating a Mess Hall (DFAC) meal today,  remember them at the table today.

Have a good day today, thank you for being there for them, for supporting them, for supporting each other. Don’t forget, if you miss them today and if you are feeling alone, you aren’t alone – we are here for you, if you need us.

LAW

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From the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs – Military Family Appreciation Week

November 26, 2008 · Filed Under LAW, Military News, Military Parents, Military Resource, National Guard Parents · Comment 

Chairman Notes Military Family Appreciation Week

American Forces Press Service
WASHINGTON, Nov. 20, 2008 – Military Family Appreciation Week begins
tomorrow, and Navy Adm. Mike Mullen, chairman of the Joint Chiefs of
Staff, issued a message today noting the observance.Here is the text of the chairman’s message:

“This
month, as we celebrate our blessings, and give thanks for our freedom
to enjoy them, we take great pride in honoring November 21-28, 2008 as
Military Family Appreciation Week.

“Families serve just as their
uniformed service members do. And the military family has rarely faced
as many challenges as our families do today. After seven years of war,
hundreds of thousands of families have served through multiple
deployments in support of operations Iraqi Freedom and Enduring
Freedom, as well as many other locations throughout the globe.

“But
the love and support of our military families do more than allow us to
serve abroad. Our families serve at the very center of American
society. They are the bedrock of a free republic which provides for a
common defense – and their commitment to the values of hard work,
self-sacrifice, and moral virtue is a source of great pride and
inspiration for us all.

“And, in this service, some families
have suffered great loss – the kind of heart-wrenching loss that echoes
for generations. We as a Nation owe the families of the wounded, and
the fallen, a lifetime of gratitude and respect for a debt which we can
never fully repay.

“On behalf of my family and those of the
Joint Chiefs, to all our military families, past and present, we thank
you for your service, your sacrifice, and your love. You truly are a
wellspring of our Nation’s honor, courage, and strength. With you by
our side, we accomplish far more than we ever could alone.”

Respectfully,

M.G. MULLEN
Admiral, U.S. Navy

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A National Guard Mom – Part 3

November 19, 2008 · Filed Under Military Parents, National Guard Parents, Parents News, deployment · 1 Comment 

The last part of my friend’s Three Part Series.   I have a disclaimer here – I am no Angel!  We helped each other, we decided that if we couldn’t get the support we needed from the official channels, we’d do it OURSELVES – we found like minded  people, and supported each other.  There are GOOD FRGs, and they are a great place to start – but if you can’t find one – get up off the couch, and do it yourself, there will be others like you to join with. LAW

Ok back to my lament…….

To prepare us all for the Unit deployment,  the NG had all soldiers, and  families come into an informational meeting.  They invited anyone that wanted information on what was about to happen to these young men and women.  They talked about the war and the jobs our soldiers would be doing, how they had been well trained to do them and how proud they were of each and every one of them.  We listened and took notes, collected fliers but really never got any answers about what we were to do after they left.  I am a very “jump in and do what ever needs to get done to support them” type of person but nothing was even mentioned about how we could help.

Now the military,  as many of  you have found out,  talks and works in a special code only they are able to decipher.  Lots of letters for departments and programs  -all of which not only have names we never hear as civilians but if you get them out of order you could be ordering a tank for your front yard.  We were given numbers of places to call for support but the numbers were bad or not the “correct” department and after being transferred over and over again I gave up.

Nick was part of an advance group who went to Mississippi ahead of the big group to set up.  There was no good-bye ceremony, no news crews there, just a bus in the middle of the night in an empty parking lot.  “Good bye son” on the bus and he was gone.  My heart died that night, it was ripped from my body and sent to war.

He spent the next weeks in Mississippi getting ready for the larger group to come down and they were also helping the recovery from Hurricane Katrina.  When the bigger group got there he helped them process in and was told to make sure each soldier has the information for the “FRG” and that he should encourage them to tell their families to join.  He passed the information to his wife and then she told me so we could also join and to get me off his back constantly asking for what I could do.  We called got the information for the first FRG meeting and Myself, Renee (Nick’s wife) my husband and my parents went in to finally get the information we needed to not only help our selves but to support our troops.

We were introduced to our “FRG Leader” who was the wife of the first sergeant serving with our boys and girls.  She was with a person from the state level FRG, and we were told there were different groups all over the state.  She talked about  many things which frankly went right over my head, we are not in the military and don’t speak Army so we were a bit lost.  We were asked to join in and help organize the group and asked if we had any ideas to help keep the families connected.  We offered our suggestions which were for the most part ignored, and dismissed until our next meeting.

To make a really long rather nasty experience shorter we gave up after just a couple of meetings.  As a family we were ignored and made to feel as outsiders, as we were not part of the unit our leader was most connected with.  When our son called to say he had been told to have his Mom back off, that was it.  Our last meeting was a Christmas Party (we only went because my grandson was registered a long time ago) at an Armory where not only did we get to sit in a gym with a bunch of tables, no one knew where to go or what to do they just sat there, nothing for the babies to do and no one was trying to greet anyone, it to say the least was a total disaster.  We were about to leave when we were blessed with a guardian angel, she came up to us and said “hey I know you”.  It turned out to be one of the other wives that had been at the awful first meeting and recognized me as being the one who every time I made a suggestion it was shot down.  She had been treated the same way.

Now not to toot my own horn or anything but I do this kind of stuff for a living -  organizing, fund raising, and group events, and I am very successful at it as well. (I can witness to that – LAW) So when I made suggestions they were not made without thought and consideration.  I was more than willing to donate as much time and effort to help out but no one ever even bothered to call me back.

The angel had given me her number and e-mail address and after some great sharing of information (she was a “lifers” wife….. yahoo someone to help me, who knew the magic codes, she was fluent in Army) we talked about the experience of the “FRG” (Family Readiness Group for those who do not know) and I was floored to find out just how the rest of the families were being treated.  People were told they were not welcome in the group, one person had no family here and was very alone, and this cruel rejection darn near did her in.  Now I am not going to go into the whole mess but leave it  that out of the over 300 families that were assigned to our group we never had more than handful of people at the meeting and near the end there were only 3 or 4 people including the leader that showed up each month.

I found this very sad, there was so much I wanted to do and be a part of here to let the unit know that not only did we support them but we were here for there families anytime they needed anything.  So with the help of our Angel we started our own group (and we invited everyone to join no matter what, even the leader from the old group came and helped) we called our selves “RHSC” (Red Headed Step Children) and we did things that made me proud and I felt like I actually counted and mattered.  We sent over 3000 cookies for Christmas, we sent 5000 thanksgiving cards that were made by area school children, we made trips to the VA here, and we held each other up and always had each others backs.

Many soldiers talk about the friendships they make while in a war, but we made the same connections here.  I would not have made it without these friends and I will love them until the day I die, I owe them everything and no matter how many miles apart or years that go by all any of them ever have to do is to call and they know I will drop everything to be there.

So my message to all of you -  is you are never alone in this and if you are in need ask.  Start a small group with someone else in your area, call another group like Blue star moms (they will also help everyone not just Moms), ask at the unit headquarters; call the chaplains connected to your unit.  Post a blog on this site and you will get answers.  You never have to face the fears of knocks on the door, phone calls in the middle of the night or that ache in your hear that just won’t go away.  Do not, and I can not say this loud enough DO NOT sit at home and get lost in the grief.  We are here for you, arms wide open!

I want to thank my angel she saved us, and we saved each other.  I love you my friend and am so proud to have you on my side!

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National Resource Directory For Wounded Warriors, Families And Caregivers

November 18, 2008 · Filed Under Military Resource, Parents News, Rules & Regulations, Some Soldier's Mom · 2 Comments 
When my son was wounded — and then when he was being medically discharged — I spent a hundred hours or more researching what treatments and benefits were available, how to access care and benefits, the process of who, what, where, when, how… because there wasn’t one place (well, there really wasn’t much of anything by way of information back in 2005 and 2006). So I was pretty thrilled to see the email below announcing a single resource guide for Wounded Warriors and their families. I haven’t reviewed this new resource directory yet, and I hope it is everything they say it is, but something is always better than nothing! And it’s about time!!

Department of Defense Launches National Resource Directory For Wounded Warriors, Families And Caregivers
The Department of Defense today launched the National Resource Directory, a collaborative effort between the departments of Defense, Labor and Veterans Affairs.

The directory is a Web-based network of care coordinators, providers and support partners with resources for wounded, ill and injured service members, veterans, their families, families of the fallen and those who support them.

“The directory is the visible demonstration of our national will and commitment to As new links are added each day by providers and partners, coverage from coast to coast will grow even greater ensuring that no part of that journey will ever be made alone,” said Lynda C. Davis, Ph.D., deputy under secretary of defense for military community and family policy.

Located at http://www.nationalresourcedirectory.org, the directory offers more than 10,000 medical and non-medical services and resources to help service members and veterans achieve personal and professional goals along their journey from recovery through rehabilitation to community reintegration.

“The VA is extremely proud to be a partner in this innovative resource. This combination of federal, state, and community-based resources will serve as a tremendous asset for all service members, veterans, their families and those who care for them. The community is essential to the successful reintegration of our veterans, and these groups greatly enhance the directory’s scope,” said Karen S. Guice, M.D., executive director, federal recovery care coordination program at the Department of Veterans Affairs.

“The National Resource Directory will prove to be a valuable tool for wounded, ill, and injured service members and their families as they wind their way through the maze of benefits and services available to them in their transition to civilian life. The Department of Labor is pleased to have the opportunity to work with our partners at DoD,” said Charles S. Ciccolella, the assistant secretary of labor for the veterans’ employment and training service.

The National Resource Directory is organized into six major categories: Benefits and Compensation; Education, Training and Employment; Family and Caregiver Support; Health; Housing and Transportation; and Services and Resources. It also provides helpful checklists, Frequently Asked Questions, and connections to peer support groups. All information on the Web site can be found through a general or state and local search tool.

The National Resource Directory’s launch in November is a key feature of Warrior Care Month.
x-posted at Milblogs and Some Soldier’s Mom.

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U.S. Post Office Holiday Mailing dates

November 16, 2008 · Filed Under Care Packages, LAW, Military Parents, National Guard Parents · 1 Comment 

Mailing Dates for packages to Iraq and Afghanistan are fast approaching. The Post Office has published their hints and their chart for mailing. As they say – Flat Rate boxes are the BEST!  You can pack heavy stuff – and cookies (or the dreaded fruitcake) and not break the budget to mail them. I love using the Sunday newspaper to pack with – gives them something to read too! The funnies, the Parade magazine, the Book section, Travel section – Local section if you want them to stay in touch – More fun than just styrofoam peanuts..

Here’s the link for  Holiday Mailing Dates.

LAW

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Holiday Challenge – Time to be Mailing!

November 16, 2008 · Filed Under Care Packages, Mamaw, Military Parents, National Guard Parents, Parents News, This & That · 3 Comments 
I was at the Dollar Store today looking for some Holiday decorations to send to my son overseas because this is the very first Christmas that he won’t be here at home. I started to think of all the other Christmases when he was little and how I always bought each one of my boys an ornament with the year on it that represented what their major interest was that particular year.  I’m sure you know what I’m talking about, the Baby’s First Christmas 1981, a Football hero, 1994, etc. But there was always one for each year for each one of the boys. I always bought them at the local Hallmark store and couldn’t wait for them to put it on the tree which was hard for me to do, the waiting that is, because I’m an early Holiday shopper.  So, while at the “D” store I put some items in the cart to send over to him because he more then likely won’t be home this year and that’s when it hit me. They had Christmas music playing and the song “I’ll be home for Christmas” was serenly wafting over the shoppers and I actually realized that I wouldn’t see him….at all….for the first time, in 26 years.  I had to blink a few times and swallow my tears because well, quite frankly, I can’t read labels without my glasses anyway and people always look at you strangely when you cry in the store because they don’t know what is wrong with you.
So, not wanting to make a spectacle of myself I concentrated on trying to read the labels of some peanut snacks and then figured the hell with it, threw them into the cart and kept on going.  (After I got home I realized the labels were in Spanish!) So I was shopping for home and shopping for him, trying to find what I could for him that would remind him of home while he is there in the sand.  Then I found the black beanie caps and bought six of those because I figured he would have a few buddies who could use a new beanie cap at Christmas.  I know, I know,  it’s like getting underwear for a present which is a no-no in our house, but that is all that they had at that particular store.
I also purchased some sparkly blue snowflake ornaments, some candy, a summer sausage and crackers to send over.  That’s when I spotted the Christmas stockings. Hmmm, I thought, it would be great to get one for each of the guys in the platoon, but I can’t afford 20 much less 150 of those by myself and fill them up with goodies too for the ones with him who have no one to send them anything.  That’s when I thought it would be a great challenge to see how many people I could get (entice? challenge? badger?) to go out and buy a Christmas stocking for a soldier and fill it with things like socks which are a true necessity now, or a black stocking cap, candy, cards, crakers, cookies, whatever!
When my boys were younger, we would always go to the local mall and each one of them would find a name on the tree of a child their age in need, and I would pick a mom and we would set out to find them something for their Christmas.  We would take our time and pick the “perfect present” and then take it back to be placed under that huge tree and then we would go have lunch knowing that we had done something for someone we didn’t know but cared enough about to send them a little happiness.
After the “D” store today, my next trip was to Wally World (Wal-Mart) to see how the prices and selection were there, and lo and behold, they have a ton of stuff for $1.00 that would fit perfectly in a stocking, and they have ornaments with the year on them as well. I was truly a happy camper!  So, even though I will be baking cookies again for them, I will be sending a couple of stockings too.  My thought is, how about others?  Do you think we are all up for a little challenge?  Let’s see what we can do for those who are unable to be home with their loved ones this year.  Especially the single soldiers.  Let’s send a little bit of home, a little bit of happiness for them to share.  I would love to know if you are able to do this, I think it would be a great way to start out the Holiday season. Even if you don’t know their name, if you know someone, anyone, who is serving away from home, send them two, three or four stockings (get your family, friends, work involved) and send them to your loved one with instructions to pass them along to others.  I know that Soldier’s Angels also has items that can be purchased and you can adopt a soldier through them too.
And while we’re at it, maybe we could all contact the Red Cross and set up a date to donate the gift of life as well.  We have set up the 18th thru the 22nd in our area, in honor of a soldier we received word about who was injured in October.  It is our way of giving back, maybe the only way we have right now.
Mamaw

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A new PSA campaign for Veterans.

November 13, 2008 · Filed Under Mamaw, Military News, Military Parents, National Guard Parents, Parents News, This & That · Comment 

From Mamaw – an announcement.

******

We’re Making History Today

I want to share something very exciting with you.

Today, IAVA is launching a ground-breaking Public Service Announcement (PSA) campaign with the Ad Council. This historic, multi-year, national effort is aimed at easing the transition for veterans returning home from combat.

Even if you’re not familiar with the Ad Council, you know their work. They have been behind some of our country’s most iconic PSA campaigns, including Smokey the Bear, “Friends Don’t Let Friends Drive Drunk”, and “A Mind is A Terrible Thing to Waste”. Now, they’ve teamed up with IAVA to create the largest campaign to date focused on veterans returning from Iraq and Afghanistan.

And at the center of this campaign is a new private social network, exclusively for Iraq and Afghanistan veterans, at CommunityOfVeterans.org.

Please help us spread the word about this historic campaign. Forward this email to your friends and family members, and tell the veterans in your life to check out CommunityofVeterans.org.

Together, we have the potential to dramatically improve the lives of Iraq and Afghanistan veterans and their families nationwide.

Thank you for standing with us, and Happy Veterans Day.

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Holiday Cards – to “any soldier”

November 12, 2008 · Filed Under This & That · Comment 

(Hat/tip to Love My Tanker at Spousebuzz)

The old Any Soldier mail was discontinued, but the Red Cross is making it possible again. Follow the link – lets get those cards moving!

Holiday Cards for Soldiers

If the link doesn’t work – here’s the address to “cut and paste”     http://www.armytimes.com/news/2008/11/ap_holidaycards_111208/

LAW

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Veteran’s Day – what it means to me – by our newest author.

November 11, 2008 · Filed Under Mamaw, Military Parents, Parents News · 5 Comments 

About Veteran’s Day:
My father served in the Army and my Grandmother (his mom) was an Army nurse at Lettermans in SF. Combine this with numerous family members that have served in almost every war, well, we have a lot of tradition regarding Veteran’s Day. When I was younger and one of my brothers was serving in Vietnam, I came to know what war was and later what a Veteran was as well. Although he came home with his body intact, we learned first-hand what PTSD was, although there wasn’t a name for it at the time. Since my brothers were all older than me, I was the one left at home to help pour the concrete in our back yard for our flag pole and when it was finished, who helped my Dad fly our American Flag for the first time. I remember how proud he looked when he pulled that halyard to raise the flag and when he tied it off, he just looked up at it for a while, in silence. I know now that he wasn’t really there with me, but that he was with his buddies and thinking of my brother in Vietnam right then. My dad never spoke about WWII and what he saw and all my brother would say about Vietnam was that he was glad he was home. My Mom lived in Oakland, California during the Korean War (she was in High School) and she would tell us stories about the black outs, the sirens and being so scared that she would run home as quickly as possible. Other than that all that my Mom has ever said about the Korean War was that so many of her high school friends perished that she had vowed to never wear black again. That makes you stop and think.

When one of my brothers became an Airborne Ranger was when I took more of an interest in the military and was planning on joining when I graduated from high school. (I didn’t sign up but that’s another story.) This particular brother, that I was used to playing army men with, that I would bug the heck out of while he was in Boy Scouts, and followed every where was suddenly a soldier. I couldn’t wait for him to come home from bootcamp! I collected military patches, learned how to make a tight, smooth rack and joined the U.S. Naval Sea Cadets when I was in high school. I even asked for and got a GI Joe for my 6th birthday!

Because of my dad, we were raised to respect and honor our flag and knew what it represented. That’s what I have taught to my own sons. To me, honoring our Veterans isn’t about flying the flag on certain holidays but knowing when, how and where to display it properly and why. It means knowing what it stands for and how it came to be. To me, because of our Veterans, those who fought for liberty, freedom at all costs, who stood up for what is right and led the way, no matter what the odds were, they deserve our respect no matter what. They are, and were, the ones putting their life on the line so that the rest of us can enjoy our day-to-day activities. Now that my oldest son is serving, I vowed to do all that I can as his parent to support him in this decision, to stand behind him cheering him on. To keep watch over his wife and daughters while he is gone as he asked me to. To thank every soldier I meet for their service to our country. He and others that are actively serving, and those who have served, need to know that we remember their service and that we appreciate all that they have done. I promised my son to do all that I can to help out here at home, visiting wounded soldiers when I can, volunteer at the USO or where ever to share a smile when needed, and to work along with, and help, other Moms and families, because we are all a part of keeping our Country strong, and because now, whether he knows it or not, he is my hero.

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CHRISTMAS & HOLIDAY PACKAGES FOR THE TROOPS

November 10, 2008 · Filed Under Care Packages, Some Soldier's Mom, This & That, deployment · Comment 

Shipping deadlines are approaching and my site meter over at Some Soldier’s Mom is filled with people searching for suggestions and information on gifts, shipping information and deadlines for holiday packages, so I put up my annual post… over at Some Soldier’s Mom.

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